Asserting my Authority

I am a fairly passive person, or rather, I am a very passive person who avoids confrontation at all costs. If I get a whiff of simmering trouble to come I take evasive, self protective measures which include the following: hinting at and alluding to problems rather than addressing them head on; kindly agreeing with whom I am speaking with even though I strongly disagree; and finally, I run away (I have never done this, but I could see myself doing it). Now, it should be noted that within the confines of the protective nest that is academia (which include in class discussions and other mediated group settings) I have been known to throw caution to the wind and state my opinions. But, when outside the nest or one-on-one with people I am a push over. Yeah, I will talk a big game behind their back, but when it's time to deliver my rebuke it takes all the courage I can muster for me to willingly create an awkward and unwanted conversation. In the rare instances when confrontation is unavoidable, as it often is when it pops up out of no where, I walk away from the incident discombobulated and shaking, which is similar to how one feels after a car crash. 

Over the years I have gotten better at asserting and maintaining my position, but winning arguments and successfully ending confrontation favorably for myself is something I have yet to accomplish. I owe my losses to one thing in particular--my inability to deliver quick witted, zinging, discussion ending comments. I am incapable of closing the deal, I just do not have the tenacity. 

Alas, there is a hope on the horizon.  As of late I have been substitute teaching for the Shasta Union High School district, where I am met with confrontation every day. 

"Mr. Tyler, can I go to the bathroom?" 

"No"

"What, are you serious?"

"You just had eight minutes of passing, you don't see me running out of the class room every period to go to the bathroom. Stay in your seat, do your work!" 

Every day I play the part of the bastard sub who follows the rules, and I enjoy it. Sure, sometimes I lapse into past people-pleasing ruts, but for the most part the daily adversity is making me a stronger person. Like yesterday, I gave out my first referral to a student which garnered an in-house suspension for the kid. It went something like this.

"Folks, this is SSR, silent sustained reading, I should not hear any talking"

The class hushes for a few seconds then resumes unnecessary cross-room banter

I raised the tone of my voice "Hey! I said no talking, the next person who talks will receive a referral!"

Kid in front row blurts "Are you serious, that's dumb"

"Try me, I guarantee you won't like the result," I shot back.

I look down at my book and hear an intentional disruptive noise, here I am stuck because I don't know who did it. 

"I herd that" I said, "I'm serious" 

Then it happened,

"blah blah blah," I can't even remember what the kid said, some dumb comment about how the class was gay no doubt, but the important thing is how I responded.

"Ding, Ding, congratulations! You got it, the referral, march yourself right up to that office, I'm calling to let them know you are on your way." 

I picked up the phone and dialed the office feeling not like I just walked away from a car crash, but rather a mild close call instead. Almost, one day, one day I will get it. 

W. I Think it's to Soon

Remember when that movie about 9/11 came out staring Nicholas Cage and every one said, "What? this is way to soon." Well if you don't remember, 9/11 happened in 2001 and this movie, the one entitled World Trade Center, was released in 2006. That is five years after the incident. Jump to present, where good old George W is still in office, yeah he is on his way out, but he really doesn't leave till January. The poor guy is not even out of the White House and a movie is released that passes judgement on him and his two terms spent as president. Oliver Stone, who incidentally directed World Trade Center, is also the director of W. Now, it should be said that I have not yet seen the film, but COME ON! does it not seem ridiculous that this film is out already? I am aware that the man was no Abraham Lincoln, but I think that it is safe to say that the proverbial dust that he has created, be it positive or negative, has not even begun to settle. How his time spent in office will effect the future of the U.S. has yet to be determined, as we must live it first before a final judgment can be passed.  To soon, to soon

   

The First Supper

For the past month or so Linz has been dying to feed carter something other than special milk from those special places. We let him suck on pieces of watermelon and cantaloupe fairly early. This may have been a mistake because ever since he has tasted these delicacies he has been really into food. If we are eating he is watching us eat, staring longingly at our steaming plates with a look that says "Whats the deal pops, hook me up with some of that delicious big kid grub." If only we could.

But alas, there is a science to feeding a five month old, a needed progression of carefully thought out substances.  As the critically acclaimed book What to Expect the First Year states, "Before the gastronomic world can be a baby's oyster (or filet or lasagna) the land of bland must be conquered" And boy is it bland. We start Carter out on single grain rice cereal with Vitablocks (a nutrient blend for Baby's growth and development--hooray!) This stuff looks and tastes like cream of wheat without the flavor. "But Scott" you say, "cream of wheat has no flavor to begin with" exactly! Now imagine cream of wheat without those extra grains and that is precisely how bland Single grain rice cereal is. 

Carter: "Oh boy, my first bite of real food, yippee!"

Mom: "Well I would not call this real food Carter, but it's where we gotta start, you are so cute right now--- are you ready, hear we go"

Carter: "Alright, not to bad, sweet on the front end. Subtitle, mellow, ahhgg what is this . . . this texture . . . what the . . . "
Carter: "Blaaahh! What a let down. Oharggag bu bub bu yucky-- I'm not sure I can take it any more"

Mom: "Oh honey, aren't those Vitablocks so yummy. You want some more? I think you d0! Scott, are you taking pictures?"

Dad: "Yes tons"

Mom: "now take a video, make sure you get a video!"

Dad:"I got it, I got it. I'm totally gonna post this on my blog"
Carter: "Yah I'll give it another shot, maybe this time it will taste better. After all you guys look like you enjoy your food . . . uhh man, Is this an acquired taste?"

Needless to say, feeding Carter the first time was tons of fun. Liz and I were nearly rolling on the floor. If you don't have a kid go out and get one today as they are so fun!

I am in the Club

the sick club that is--Freaking Awesome. Compounded by the fact that I was out of town this past weekend doing some electrical work in the San Jose area. In all it was a great trip and I made some good money, but it was not fun being away from Carter and Linz for four nights. Linz would put the phone up to Carter's ear so I could talk to him. She said his eyes would light up and he would look around for me (he doesn't get the concept of a phone yet). I got in late last night, so this morning was the fist time he saw me. I picked him up out of bed to change him, he looked up and I watched his mind register the fact that it was me. He smiled really big as his whole body gesticulated in baby excitement. It was like he was saying "Dad, your home, I really missed you!" 

Real Baby Toys

Carter is five months old now. Every day he does something new and amazing, not like multiple flips or juggling fire, but amazing baby stuff like exploring his world, rolling over, putting everything in his mouth, and belly laughing at our funny faces and noises. In all, he is more of a little person than he was three months ago, not that he was never a person or anything but you know . . . he's no longer a pooping blob,  he is a smiling, laughing, pooping person.

What I have noticed is that babies are smart. Carter knows that his toys are fundamentally different from the stuff that I interact with such as food, magazines, food, cell phones and food. Carter will play with his colorful, noisemaking, specialized baby toys for maybe five minutes before he gets board. But, give him a "real" object and the kid is entertained for a solid ten minutes. The following is a  photo documentary of specific "real" object interactions:

First My Tie--10 minutes of play time:

Then latter that same day my watch:

And finally, with the In and Out bag, of which he was really jazzed about. He was throwing that thing around like crazy and then would suck the fry grease of his hands. It was awesome. Linz and I were rolling on ground with laughter. Carter was in real toy heaven!

I think I am going to start a company that manufactures toys for babies. I would just take real objects and sanitize them and then sell them. 

I going out of town for a few days to work. I am really going to miss the little guy. 

Bad Bailout

I think it is safe to say that I am not alone when it comes to being confused about the current economic climate. How the passing of the bailout bill directly effects the stock market's rise and fall is beyond me. However, I do know that it does not directly effect me either. I believe that whatever those crazed lunatics in Washington decide to do has no effect on my economic standing. The only person that is responsible for that is me--the government does not exist to put Band-Aids on my boo boos--having the opportunity to make my own decisions and take responsibility for my own life is what makes America so great. If I manage my money correctly, without greed, and think before I invest I should be OK. Regardless I am the one who pulls the trigger, not the government.   To believe that Washington can do something for you, that they will take care of you, is one of the most dangerous myths you can buy into, because the moment you believe that horse poo you begin a debilitating downward slide into the land of identity-stealing fear. The media wants you to be frightened--don't be! For more on this check out this amazing article by Dave Ramsey, it will make you smile.

A final unrelated thought: debt is bad right? So why then is the government using debt to fix debt? That is fundamentally retarded--come on. This country is not in a credit crisis, it is in a debt crisis. This is part of a cyclical market and we are in a purging cycle. Anyone who can't hang on should fall off. Do you agree, or am I totally off my rocker.

Jogging, I believe the j is silent though, right?

 

So as of late, I have endeavored on what many would consider an absurd pastime, running. It probably has something to do with the olympics this year, and also my need as a new father to establish a lasting habit that will usher me into manhood. My belief is that if I have the discipline to push myself though miles of trails and pavement than I will have the discipline to be a better father and a better husband. 

Further, I recently realized that at the tender age of 23 I am now entering the prime of my life--mature enough to think responsibly (or at least I hope), and young enough to demand massive amounts of energy from my body. I thought, why waste such an extraordinary period in my life? I've got old personal records from high school to shatter and bigger and better goals to achieve.

The last reason was an as assistant coaching position. A good friend of mine is the head coach of the Simpson University Cross-Country team. Knowing I ran on a championship team in high school (and were we champions! read the second paragraph in this wikipedia article) I was offered the job and took it. I never thought I would enjoy making runners puke so much. Watching people achieve their goals and push their body to the limits is one of the most exhilarating things I have ever been a part of. To be precise, it comes in a distant third behind the birth of my son and my wedding day.